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Thursday, September 30, 2010

Anxiety...my worst enemy

For those who dont know, I have serious issues with anxiety. If I could stay in my house and never go anywhere at all, I'd be perfectly happy. Unfortunately, I dont have that option. It already keeps me from being able to hold a real job but I continue to fight against it keeping me from supporting my children and doing some of the things I love. At the moment, I'm in a panic as I wait to go and work the concession stand at the high school football game. I dont do this because I enjoy it or the games for that matter. The crowds, the noise, the craziness...actually make me want to hide. I do it because I love my daughter. Working the concession stand benifits the band and therefore benefits her and its a tangible way for me to show her how proud I am of her and how much I love her. Having said that...holy cats...why did i agree to do this!!

The same anxiety that keeps me from getting out and doing also keeps me from taking the steps needed to make a career as an artist. So while I work to do more and beat back some of this anxiety, I am also looking for ways to get my art out there without me actually having to get out there myself. Look for an etsy store in the future and an art open house as we get closer to the holidays. I welcome any suggestions or ideas you might have and I'm so thankful to any of you that are actually reading this! Pray for me too if you would. I need all the help i can get.

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